Preview: Duke Nukem Forever pt. 2

Sorry for not posting for a while. This was a. because my internet (dammit Australia) slowed down to unusable ADSL speeds, and b. I was gashed by the preview I saw of Duke Nukem Forever. It was the same as last years. A CGI rendering of Dukey smoking and saying a tough-guy line. No gameplay. Nothing revealed. No game, as far as we can tell. More news soon.

Review: Call of Duty 9: Back to Basics

There are two main problems with this game.

1. It's set in WWI. Seriously, why set a game in a time when weapons are so frustrating to use?
2. It's made by Treyarch. Infinity Ward, haven't you realised that after the massive flops of three and five that you're the only ones good at making these. Hell, it must be bad for your sales, or something. After 3 pretty much put me of 4, and 5 scared me away from 6, I'm glad I persisted. But I barely did.

First off, the online is balls. Absolute shit. A laggy nightmare compared to Infinity Ward's games. The single player is a far cry from the epic set of amazing effects and gameplay coming from the other games. It's just derivative. Shoot enemies, shoot enemies, rescue a hostage(!), shoot enemies. That's it. And unlike II, WWI didn't really have any clear baddies, so you're left questioning the ethics of your actions. But not in a good, MGS way. Plus the PC version has lockon on all difficulty levels, so points off for that. Oh wait, I can't give negative points.

2/10.

Preview: Duke Nukem Forever

It's going to come out this year. I know it. Sure, it's missed the last few E3s, but checking my emails I have been invited to a special announcement in a couple of months. Attached to the email was a screenshot. Sure, it didn't feature any gameplay, only a super-high resolution shot of the Duke himself holding a stupidly large gun. Have hope, my friends! Duke will be here before 2020, I know it!

Review: Metal Gear Solid 6: Liquid Earth

Blah. The easiest way to describe this game. Or maybe meh. Anyway, despite Guns of the Patriots being Snake's last adventure, Kojima and Konami have used a little loophole to milk the series a little more. Disappointingly, just like in 5, and 2, you play as Raiden. He was okay in Sons of Liberty, where Kojima apparently wanted you to see comparatively macho Snake from a third-person perspective. But without a Big Boss clone to protect him, Raiden is just a cock. Spending every second cutscene whining about how scared he is or some shit about his girlfriend, you'll really wish Snake was still around. Even worse, the game has decided to focus on the 'Action' portion of 'Tactical Espionage Action'. This would be okay if the control system had been changed for this. It hasn't. Holding R1 to move into first-person in what is now essentially a first-person shooter gets really old, really quickly. The story is still brilliant, even if most of the twists happened during the first four games and there isn't really much left untold to be revealed here. Here's an idea, Konami: create another prequel, set before Snake Eater. It chronologically wouldn't be a new game for Snake, and therefor you could still have kept your promise. And my attention. Liquid Earth isn't bad, it's just shit compared to the first few games. A seven out of ten, I guess.

7/10

Welcome to Gaming in 2019!

If, like I was, you're bored of today's games and the reviews of them, step into a virtual time machine and see reviews from 11 years in the future! With Windows 10 SP4, Direct X 15 and most computers running above thirty gigs of ram, PCs are certainly ahead here in the future. The Playstation 5, XBOX 620 (always trying to be ahead with the naming!) and Super Nintendo Gaming System (the retro name hasn't really helped Nintendo out, with gamers wishing for the glory days of the Wii) no graphical slouches either. So enough introduction, get ready for reviews!